Thursday March 1, 2007 5:00 PM

Today started out pretty well. Jim's nurse yesterday had been telling me something about how he's "losing blood" and that scared the crap out of me. I really didn't understand what he was talking about. I asked him, "Is he bleeding somewhere?" and he says, "Oh, we really don't know." And I said, "Look, I'm a little jumpy right now and this blood thing is scaring me- you know what my husband just went through. Can you please have the doctor call me?"

So first thing this morning the surgeon who did the work on Saturday, Dr. Tannas, called me and explained. It's a similar thing to how you get vitamins into your body. If you eat vegetables, you absorb more vitamins than if you took a vitamin pill. The transfusions that Jim is getting to try and get his blood volume back up don't get absorbed by the body as well as if it were his own body making the blood cells. So they pump 'em in, so to speak, but they don't all "stick". He said not to worry. Of course, there's no guarantees that no more odd things are going to happen to the man, but it's beyond remote. (Well, so was this last incident, but he at least made me feel more secure). He also told me that Jim got another feeding tube inserted today. I told him, look- yesterday Jim said to me that him and what army were going to put that feeding tube in again. Dr. Tannas laughed and told me he did it himself. I also repeated the nurse and the blood and the coding and the waiting ten minutes for help story. Dr. Tannas was horrified. He pointed out that it might have even been the nurse assigned to Jim who chose not to respond right away- not necessarily the person who saw Jim's blood. He promised to get to the bottom of it. If they don't, I'm filing a complaint with the Massachusetts Department of Public Health.

Then I got a call from Lahey Clinic's scheduling department and they gave me a cardiology appointment for next week- the 8th. Thank God! And a few minutes later I heard back from the social worker, and they got me an Internal Medcine appointment with the doctor she knows tomorrow at 2:30. I told the doctor's secretary...You let Dr. Frank know that she's a wonderful woman! So I'm finally going to get the help I so desperately, desperately need. I called my cardiologist's nurse at Deborah and she agreed to Fedex me all of the test results that they already have on file so I don't have to repeat them. It looks like it's all coming together.

We went to see Jim this afternoon and he looks much better. His color is more rosy. He was a little annoyed, though, because they got him up into a chair today because someone from physical therapy was going to come down and get him walking around, but the person never showed up, and he wound up being in the chair for what HE says was eight hours, but it was probably more like six. Sitting in the chair is good for him, though, because it helps him get the crap out of his lungs. Just the fact that he was able to SIT in the chair that long was a good sign. So they get him back in bed right before we got there and then in comes the physical therapist asking if he wants to go walking. Jim's speech is much better now so he says to her, "What- are you KIDDING?" She had a good sense of humor about it and said they'd try again tomorrow. Now he's after me to get him ice cream- telling me some bullshit story about how they're giving out free ice cream at the hospital today. Oh, hell no I told him. He's not allowed to eat or drink ANYTHING until all his sutchers heal and he passes a swallowing test. I'm guessing they won't even try to give him a swallowing test for a minimum of another week to 10 days. They are going to be extra, extra cautious now.

I also noticed on Jim's table that they had a cup of water and these little mouth swap things so he could at least wet the inside of his mouth. He told me hell- he drank some of the water. He's listening to Dr. Jim now. Don't worry guys....I'll hit him in the head to knock some sense into him.

But he's still in the ICU and not in a regular room. I was told that part of that is because they just want to keep a closer eye on him until that pneumonia clears and they get his blood count up. Then they'll move him to a totally different wing and totally different floor than the LAST one he was on. Probably because they don't want any violence.

The in-laws are leaving tomorrow. They're taking me to dinner tonight again. I told them, please- something light. When I woke up this morning my lower intestines were crying for help for two hours.